


Wishing for a miracle + hope

by NatalieRyan



Series: Wunderkind related stories [1]
Category: MacGyver (TV 2016), Wunderkind (MacGyver TV 2016 Fanfiction)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Angst, Feels, Found Family, Gen, Introspection, Jack's thoughts process, POV Jack Dalton, mentions of MacGyver characters, mentions of events in Wunderkind, musings, wunderkind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:48:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26019808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NatalieRyan/pseuds/NatalieRyan
Summary: Jack's thoughts immediately after chapter 12 of Wunderkind-Season 1 "Scissors"
Relationships: Jack Dalton & Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016)
Series: Wunderkind related stories [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1980883
Comments: 6
Kudos: 19





	Wishing for a miracle + hope

**Author's Note:**

  * For [N1ghtshade](https://archiveofourown.org/users/N1ghtshade/gifts).



> Few days ago I started reading this amazing story by my dear friend thethistlegirl (JustAnotherWriter or N1ghtshade on ao3) and let me tell you I'm nowhere near halfway through season 1 of that story and I'm blown away. It's a great story, the characterization is so well thought out, everyone's got their own voice and their stories are so well intertwined, it's just so pleasant to plunge into it and read. It's been in my to read list since forever and I finally decided to start it. I almost leave everything else to the side just to read this story, and it shouldn't surprise me because once I get immersed in reading, it's tough for someone to just pull me away. 
> 
> This little piece came to life few hours ago, as I just finished reading chapter 12 and I had such a strong reaction and had to get it out. At first it was just a thought, that once I opened google docs formed into this story. I shared it with thistle and then decided to post it. 
> 
> It takes directly after chapter 12, so I suggest that you read Wunderkind first and the said chapter and then this story. If you decide to read it without having read Wunderkind, then some of the things might not seem familiar. I didn't put too many spoilers, but the fact is, this is an AU so what's mentioned is automatically a spoiler and would have you wanting to know more about it, so it's better to have read WK before this one. 
> 
> Thank you thistle for letting me play in this universe and for liking this as much as I did writing it. 
> 
> [Wunderkind chapter 12](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16166894/chapters/39930348#workskin)

_ “Hope is the thing with feathers  _

_ That perches in the soul  _

_ And sings the tune without the words _

_ And never stops at all” _

_ -Emily Dickinson _

Jack had done lots of bad things over the years. He killed people to get the job done. Watched as people were killed and not being able to do anything. Had to get information for missions using not so conventional ways of persuasion. But nothing hurt so much as this situation he got himself into. It was one of his worst nightmares come true and it was a testament to how fucked up things were that he didn't even hope for a miracle. 

He was playing on borrowed money ever since the Sandbox. He wasn't supposed to make it out of there. His life was dangerous, he was gambling with it, but by some miracle he survived and came home. The only reason until some months ago why he was alive, was that he had Riley to think about. She gave his life a purpose and meaning. It feels like it was a lifetime ago when Mac entered his life by this point. 

Jack didn't know he was openly crying, still sitting in the driveway to Mac's house, unable to part and break his own heart even more. Because if he left right then and there, there won't be anything that can indicate that things are going to be okay. 

He just wanted this Christmas to be a tad different. He was aware the kid's last two years were spent in supermax and he wanted to get him home for Christmas, introduce him to the Dalton dynasty and let his Momma stuff him with delicious food. He imagined food fights and laughing full table. Instead he got Mac going rogue to save his best friend and really Jack wasn't mad, but what Mac did led to Bozer learning the truth and Jack's heart was fit to burst with how much pain he felt when he saw the kid desperately trying to keep both sides appeased until things were resolved. 

It shouldn't be on the kid. After all they were the ones that pulled him out of prison, they were the ones that gave him only one choice. But after the hell Mac went through on the inside was it really a choice or just salvation? 

Jack was tired. He was supposed to do better, he was supposed to prevent this from happening. But he was also aware that it wasn't on him. As much as it wasn't that Bozer eventually was gonna learn the truth. It was gonna happen, whether now or months down the road. Jack only wished it was under different circumstances.

He hated that he had to lie to Bozer. That both he and Riley, and Sam and Patty were keeping secrets. That they were the ones that led to the kid keeping secrets from Bozer as well. 

He was relieved that he didn't have to hide what they did from Bozer now, but at the same time it was breaking Jack's heart because Bozer was probably hating their guts right now and in the least trying to convince Mac not to trust them. 

Jack could see the hurt and distrustful looks Bozer gave them ever since he learned about them being spies. How the cogs in his head worked to connect the dots of all the times they did something in proximity to Bozer and only now realizing that it wasn't just typical lawyer business. 

Jack slowly peeled off the driveway and headed back to LA traffic. For once it was slow and he could drive faster to clear his head. He couldn't go back home to his empty apartment and lock himself up with his dark thoughts. He hadn't felt like this in a while, not even after Bishop, and he had enough nightmare material for years to come from that alone. But it was bound to happen sooner or later. 

Were they just using the kid for their own gain? Were they letting someone higher up pull the strings and play them all as pawns or were they willing participants in the scheme that brought Mac to their team? 

Jack was wary of the kid at first, but even he couldn't deny the pull he felt. That protective, parental instinct he thought was only reserved for Riley since they were partnered at the CIA. There was something about Mac that brightened Jack's days and he felt a new onslaught of tears at trying to imagine a future that was Mac-less. 

What would happen when the kid was cleared from the charges and his conviction was overturned? Because there was no doubt in Jack's mind that the kid was innocent. Would Mac choose to do something else, leave the spy world? Would he look back at this period of his life and think that he fucked up another try at having stable relationships in his life? Would he even remember them? 

Jack knew that it wasn't good to let these thoughts overcome him. Nothing good came out of them, ever, but at the same time his brain seemed to be acting out today and Jack didn't really care. 

He can still see Mac's face, tear-streaked and his big blue eyes glassy and full of emotions. Conflicting emotions. Because there was no doubt the kid cared about them. But Bozer was his oldest, and only friend before this team, this family. Jack hated to be even thinking that, but he hated it even more if Mac had to eventually choose. 

Jack was selfish, he knew that, but he really wanted Mac in his life. He was selfish for even thinking about it. Jack didn't deserve a miracle. Not after what he let happen to the kid and constantly dragging him in danger.

_ Although Jack was sure if Mac wanted an out he could have slipped out of the tether, just like he did on his first day at the job. Just like he did to go and save Bozer. He could have ran. But he didn't. He stayed.  _

Despite his stupid old heart and his brain telling him not to hope, he did. It was that time of the year. It was time for miracles to happen and surprises and happiness. Time for family and joy. Not time where his heart was shattering in million pieces and every breath felt like someone stabbed him in the lungs. Something lodged himself in his ribcage and Jack didn't want to think about it, he didn't want to address it, but the fact is, Jack knew what was that thing. He was afraid of losing Mac. He was afraid of losing someone precious that wormed his way into Jack's life, into his heart and got under his skin, making himself home without even realizing it. 

Jack hoped for one more miracle, where Mac wouldn't have to choose, where everyone would be alright. At this point he'd take a hostage negotiation at Nakatomi Plaza rather than this heartbreak. 

For now, he just kept going, kept driving aimlessly. 

_ Because he can't do anything else. He can't go home, he can't focus. He needs to get himself together, and brace for the worst.  _

He hoped this wouldn't happen, but it did. 

At least he got to see Mac genuinely smile and if nothing happened after this, if Mac somehow cut ties, the heartbreak would be worth it because the kid smiled and it was all that Jack needed to see. Mac was healing. Slowly but surely. There were so many setbacks in so little time Jack was sure they were all running on fumes. But the positive thinking kept Jack going even on his darkest days. 

_ Pray for the best, hope for the worst, that's what Pop always said. And off we go.  _

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts?


End file.
